When people purposely misunderstand me, misconstrue what I say, take my words and twist them into something I didn’t say and don’t believe, I will literally double over in pain. I can go from calm and level headed to very angry and frustrated, and it’s not intentional, it’s my fight or flight response kicking in, because I am absolutely, 100%, without question, unequivocably terrified of being misunderstood and labeled something I’m not, and that I will then be judged on that misunderstanding.
I go to great lengths to be understood, and that makes me an easy target for trolls, or just bored people who want to make me squirm as some kind of entertainment.
Have any of you noticed that I essentially state my position on something without hedging it? Like if you asked me what I think of a politician, I will just say “I don’t like them, because…” and then give specific reasons as to why? Yeah, because I want my intent to be clear as glass, I want it to be well understood.
I am not cut out for debate for that reason. It’s why I liked Lenin’s approach to debate as I mentioned in a previous post. Having to explain myself over and over and over again, especially in text format, a medium which does not require repeating, is beyond frustrating, because I’m aware someone can just read what I said before and build on that, but they don’t.
The whole point of that is to wear someone down, or to get them so out of sorts they misspeak, say something they don’t mean the way it comes out, and then it’s pounced on. Most forums, for example, I avoid the debate sections these days for that reason. I have a position, I can defend it, until the tactics I mention are employed.
Now, anyone worth their salt might say “oh, they’re just trolling them and trying to confuse them, that feels wrong,” but most people really want to be entertained by good drama, and will stay silent, or even join in if the person is unpopular enough, or just really making a boring day better.
Is it any wonder social media sites like Twitter, with its 280 character limit, makes the lives of people with ADHD, Autism, and other neurodivergent traits more difficult?
If you like to egg people on, and troll people who are only trying to be honest with you, please rethink that, okay? Is it really worth putting someone in physical pain because their brain is desperate not to be misunderstood? Just something to think about.
Love you.
Sarah