Shifting Focus

As of late, I’m sure many (both) of you have noticed my shifting away from introspective posts emphasizing the pain I feel every day, and am now focusing more on what is happening around me instead. Of course, I’m still talking about how it is affecting me, but the focus has definitely shifted outward.
Without getting into it (you can read past posts to get an idea), recently I was witness to a few things which troubled me deeply, things which shook me at my very core. Moreso, they disturbed me on a fundamental level from which I still haven’t fully recovered. Because of it, I realized that even though things were going poorly in my own life, there were other lives out there being outright destroyed.
While I have touched on such things in the past, it was then that I felt it was important I step up and start paying better attention to the world around me. Let me tell you, being casually aware of outside events, and then focusing on the outside world are two wildly different experiences. There is so much going on, that dealing with it is like trying to contain a waterfall with a teacup. It is positively overwhelming. As a result of that realization, along with the aforementioned events that shifted everything, I have experienced far more anxiety attacks than normal, some of them lasting more than a day.
It is also why you’re seeing more posts here. Posting what I’m seeing, how I’m feeling, helps me to deal with it in a more fruitful manner than just letting the sheer terror consume my mind. It also helps me to know I’m not alone, that I’m not the sole witness to the horrible events we’re seeing day to day. You see, what happened caused some of the very foundations upon which I stood to be severely shaken. Some of them cracked, others crumbled, and suddenly I felt unsupported in areas where I desperately needed support.
So if you were curious as to the shift in focus and why I have begun to focus on more outward issues, that is why. It helps me cope with what I’m feeling inside, and keeps me from falling over the edge. It also helps me concentrate my efforts on helping out here, on doing more to protect people who have no voice, and cannot fight back for themselves. It still does not feel like enough, but it’s a start. I hope to build on it.