Life is such an awkward thing. When I was born, I was born too premature to survive the first few weeks of my life unassisted. I was hooked to machines, and those machines kept me alive. It could be why I am able to bond with technology, I don’t know. It also meant that I couldn’t be held or touched by human beings for the first 45 days of my life. Sometimes I think that I shouldn’t have been born,…
I’ve become concerned about my health as of late. I usually try to take care of myself as best as I can under the circumstances, but of course when resources are limited (time and money in particular), one has to often choose less healthy option, particularly when it comes to food. I am diabetic, as many of you (by that I mean both of you) surely know, so I have to be especially cautious about what I eat. Unfortunately, lately…
I am exhausted. I am bone weary. I’m tired. What I want to do is just lay in my bed, and not move. I don’t want to answer questions, I don’t want to see to people’s needs, I don’t want to get up and get a drink of water even if my lips are like sandpaper; I just want to rest. Why is everything always uphill? I don’t want to climb that hill any more. I need more than a…
Yet another positive, upbeat post. I’ve been going through a really strong depression lately. I’ve been clinically depressed for years, but the past few months have been very bad, with this past week being the darkest. Nothing I have been working toward is working out. I’m doing my best, as are those involved in working toward making things better, and so is the person who needs it the most, but it seems like we’re getting nowhere. I’m coming to the…
Ah, the biological beckoning that comes with Spring: you make my already difficult, and lonely, life that much more difficult and lonely. Today is not a good day. My mind is in overdrive, and my body is sitting still because it’s in neutral. These days are extraordinarily difficult to handle, and I know the number of them will continue to increase.